Hello iWaited family!! Please help me welcome our newest couple Sondra and Jerome!! Sondra and Jerome are newlyweds, they were married this past November. I absolutely loved to talking to them. This interview was so hilarious. I loved their humor and humility. And guess what?? They’re expecting their first baby!!! And they just did a gender reveal on Facebook….and it’s a GIRL!!! Give them your congrats in the comments. With no further ado, I introduce Sondra and Jerome.
1. Please state your names and tell me about yourself?
Jerome: My name is Jerome Dennis Taylor. I am 29 years old and I am a licensed attorney in the State of Illinois. My area of practice is Labor and Employment and I work for the federal government. We attend New Life Covenant Church, under Pastor John Hannah, and I currently serve on the dance ministry.
Sondra: My name is Sondra and I’m a school social worker. I work with elementary school students who are in kindergarten through 3rd grade and have special education needs. I currently work at two schools actually, providing them with counseling services, crisis management and IEP (Individualized Education Program). At New Life Covenant, I am a leader of our Young Adult ministry, which is called Joshua Gathering. I helped to found that ministry in our church and I also participate in The F.I.R.M. (Follow-up Information Resource Ministry, which is part of our new members’ ministry.
2. How did you meet your mate? Jerome: We went to college at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. I was majoring in Sociology. She was majoring in Psychology. But we ended up taking a couple of classes together. Honestly, I knew her name and she knew my name but—
Sondra: –We weren’t friends. *laughs*
Jerome: After we graduated, she went to get her Master’s degree in Social Work (MSW) and I went to law school. We both graduated from our respective programs in 2010, and reconnected at church in 2012. And when I say reconnected, I’m using that term loosely because we weren’t really friends in college. She was a familiar face at New Life, and I remembered her always being nice, so when I saw her at church, I would say hi. We would do small talk whenever we would see each other, but at that point, I had no intention on us dating. I wasn’t even sure if she liked me. There was one time I saw her in deep worship and I walked up to her to try to say hi—
Sondra: –And he’s trying to talk to me while I’m in worship.
Jerome: She said “I can’t talk right now, let me give you my number”. About 8-10 months later and I was in prayer and I said “God I’m ready to start dating” and she popped into my head. I looked in my phone and her number was already in there. I had never used the number after she put it in my phone but at that moment, I knew it was the right time. I texted her and said we should hang out and she agreed. We went out the next day. We went to the ICON Movie Theater and I selected a random movie for us to see—Temptation by Tyler Perry. That sparked some amazing conversation and the chemistry was “Wow”. After the movie was over, we stayed in the lounge area at the theatre and talked for four hours. We stayed until they turned off the lights and said it was time to go. I remember walking her to her car and then walking to my car thinking about how much we clicked—
Sondra: —Then he did not call or ask me out again for another 6 months.
PAUSE No SIR Jerome!
Jerome: *laughs* I got back home and I was so excited that it went so well. Then I went to sleep, I woke up and I got scared. I knew at that point that she could be the one and I wasn’t sure if I was ready for that. I wanted to date but I didn’t know if I was ready for the one. Not that I dated all loosely, especially since I was a virgin and not having sex. I dated with a purpose and hope that I was going to find the one. If I wasn’t going to be serious, I didn’t want to play with her. I knew that if I wasn’t going to fully commit to dating/courting her that I would not waste her time. It was clear that she was a precious gem from the beginning. She was a real woman of God.
Me: But you told the Lord you wanted to date (Listen, I was mad FOR Sondra LOL)
Jerome: I told Him (God) that on a Sunday, I texted her on a Monday and by Tuesday we were on a date. I got a little scared. I’ve been on plenty of dates where it was “Yea, I’m definitely never calling her again” but this wasn’t like that. I was wondering if I was ready for this to be IT? I wasn’t even a full-time member at our church at that time; I was just going to bible study every Thursday. After that amazing date, although I never called, I would see her on Thursdays and say “I need to call you…We should hang out again”—
Sondra: —Every Thursday for 6 months.
Me: That was the ultimate mixed signals
Sondra: I was not really bothered by the delay because I was so unsure of what the outing was. I did not know if it was a date or not. I was not attached to him in any way. I just did not believe that we would hang out again. So Jerome was on this weight loss journey and he would post pictures of him meal prepping on Facebook. In October, I decided to flirt with him and asked him to be my personal chef. And he agreed to give me cooking lessons and we set up a date.
Jerome: By this time we went out on our second date, I had to move out of my two bedroom apartment and move in with my grandmother. When she asked me to do cooking lessons, I asked her could we do the cooking lesson at her house and she told me that something was wrong with her sink. After letting her know that I had moved back home, she agreed to come and get her cooking lessons from me at my grandmother’s house. It was the most embarrassing date/cooking lesson ever. My grandmother is normally gone on Saturdays but that particular Saturday, she would not leave! Ultimately, it turned out great. The chemistry was still there and she completely accepted where I was at that point in my life i.e. living back at home with grandma and working to get my finances in order. Four and half months later, I proposed.
3. How long did you date and how long was your engagement?
Jerome: I started courting Sondra on November 23, 2013. At this point, I knew that she was the woman who God created just for me. On February 12, 2014, I started planning our surprise proposal/ engagement party. On March 12, 2014, I took her father to lunch and asked him for his daughter’s hand in marriage, and he emphatically gave me approval to marry his daughter. The following month, on April 12, 2014, I proposed. We officially became one, and were married on November 22, 2014.
4. Sondra, do you feel like you heard clearly from God concerning Jerome? Sondra: I did—I did not hear Him at first; I was kind of going with the flow because it was happening so fast. So I slowed down and said “Wait a minute, I need to consult The Lord about this”. I had been praying the whole time but I had not really ASKED God if this was the person He had for me. I remember one day praying—and I was nervous to ask because I feel like I had gone so far already—and I said “Lord is he the one for me, am I supposed to marry Jerome?” And I heard God say, “You will be a great wife to Jerome” and I broke down crying. I already knew that he was the one but I had doubts about me and my ability to be a wife.
5. How did you broach the subject of sex? Did you assume you were going to wait because you were both virgins?
Jerome: I told Sondra on our first date that I was a virgin and I wanted to marry a woman who was a virgin as well. I told her I’ve waited, so I know God has someone for me that waited as well. So on our first date when she told me she was a virgin as well, it was as if the angels rejoiced :). Once you get to that age—28 years old—and you are still a virgin, you might as well wait. Prior to dating Sondra, I had even told God that the next woman I dated, “If she’s willing, I’m ready because this (the wait) was just ridiculous! I’m getting too old God!” LOL
6. What made you stick to your guns in terms of remaining a virgin?
Sondra: For me, it wasn’t an option. I felt that if I was going to make a mistake, it could not be in this area. I had a personal relationship with God, and I had seen the Lord protect and keep me even when I tried to do wrong. Every situation where I tried to go against the will and plan of God for my life ended up being crash and burn situations. For example, when I tried to party in college, every party I went to…the power would go out or someone would start shooting…party over. I had a boyfriend throughout college and I believed that helped to keep me. He did pressure me but we were dating long distance. While on campus, whenever temptation did come, I could always say “Well I have a boyfriend, I can’t play with you”. Even after college, I definitely put myself in compromising situations but because I was so outspoken about my faith, and I would let guys know what I stood for, they wouldn’t even try to have sex with me. Even when I ended up in someone’s bed, and almost about to engage in the act, God would shut it down. I also feared that I would be the one to end up with triplets like my aunt *laughs*. Additionally, while I was in high school, I struggled with masturbation and watching pornography. Each time, I would get so convicted about it. It was so hard and confusing being filled with lust all of the time. Thank God He delivered me from it. And lastly, I was scared about having sex (the act).
Jerome: As a teenager, I didn’t really have a whole lot of confidence in myself and how I looked. So I decided that if no one wanted me I would just be solo until I bloomed and became the man who I knew I was. I also used to have dreams of having sex with a girl and getting her pregnant and being devastated that I could no longer become a judge 🙂 because I’ve always had a lifelong goal of being a judge. Even though I grew up in the projects, I knew I was going to be a judge. Basically, fear helped me stick to my guns about not having sex. In addition, I dated a girl in college for four and half years, and we did some things, but we never had sex because she was a virgin as well.
SideQuestion: How did you get started in pornography?
Sondra: I was probably about 13 and I was on AOL talking to a stranger. That stranger told me to go to a website and watch something and that was the start to it.
Jerome: I was affected by pornography as well and it started around 13 years old. My uncle left a tape in the VCR and I started watching. From there I started getting on websites in high school and college. I felt so much guilt and shame because I knew it was not the will of God. That thing is a stronghold, especially for men because we’re so visual and so able to easily please ourselves.
7. Who kept the both of you accountable? Jerome: We kept each other accountable. We took pre-marital classes and we were really busy. We were buying a house, so that also kept us busy. We kept telling each other “We made it this far, we can wait”.
Sondra: We also had close friends who were praying for us and encouraging us to wait.
8. What kind of boundaries did you set?
Jerome: We tried to set so many boundaries like not being on the phone after ten, not staying over past ten and not spending the night. We crossed the boundaries a few times but nothing happened. It was really God’s grace that kept us. To be so deeply in love with someone, and to know that they’re your soul mate and that you will get to have sex with them in a few months, the enemy can be sneaky and try to creep in.
9. Were you ever tempted to have sex?
Sondra: I would get so convicted after making out sometimes and I would cry and Jerome would be wondering why I’m crying.
Jerome: Then I would feel horrible about letting us go too far. I had a guy friend who encouraged me during our courtship and told me that I was her “Purity Protector” (
10. Why do you believe God asks us to remain pure before marriage?
Sondra: I believe it’s for our protection. There are so many things that come with sex; you’re at your most vulnerable place physically. When you open yourself up physically, you then open yourself up spiritually and emotionally. When you open yourself up like that to someone who’s not your Purity Protector or someone who’s not in covenant with you, it’s damaging. You open yourself to soul ties, demons and that person’s spirit. I’ve seen my friends become a lot like the people they’re sleeping with and it’s scary to see. It’s one of the biggest doors you can open to the enemy.
Jerome: I just think it’s something that’s supposed to happen with the person you’re in a covenant relationship with. It’s such an intimate and godly thing; it’s an act of worship in my opinion. God is a God of order and requires us to do things in a certain way for our protection. You can have sex…just in a marriage. Some of my guy friends were some of the most emotionally unstable people I knew because they had a million soul ties; and were wondering why they couldn’t control their emotions. When I saw that, I decided it wasn’t worth it. I knew in my heart that I was supposed to wait.
11. What are your final thoughts or words of encouragement for the readers?
Jerome: I would encourage anyone that’s waiting to continue to wait, it’s so worth it. Sex is amazing, beautiful, pleasurable and intimate. The reward of being obedient to God is so great. God honors the sacrifice that we make because He knows the world we live in. If you haven’t held on, I would encourage you to start now and seek God to be cleansed.
Sondra: I would encourage them to really have a real relationship with God. A real prayer life. A real worship life. Find scriptures about waiting, about sex and about marriage. Honor God with your body. My theme scripture with my accountability partner was Matthew 6:33, “But seek first His kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you” NIV. Once you focus on Him, it’s not so much about the things. Once I got off of me and the things that I wanted and started focusing on Him and falling in love with Him, I started to truly understand love. Then I could invite what God had for me into my life.